Frustration is a good sign. It really is.
It means you’re growing, you’re stretching yourself, and there are new opportunities for you to step into.
And, it means that you’re being invited to your next level of leadership in your business and life. You know, that take-100%-responsibility-for-my-results thing? Yeah, that.
Think about that for a minute.
It's Up to YOU
Isn’t it powerful? YOU have the power to choose and be at cause in your life. Things don’t happen to you when you’re at cause, but you start to see that they are actually happening for you.
You don’t have to give your power away to external circumstances, other people’s opinions, the economy, or anything else.
You get to decide how this rolls out.
So, what does this look like? What is an example of how you’re being called forward?
So, you have a client that drains your energy. She drains your energy because she sends you text messages and sends you tons of emails and asks for detailed feedback (which is all beyond the scope of how you agreed to work together.) She doesn’t complete the pre-call questions and so your calls with her extend beyond the allotted time because you want to make sure she gets what she needs.
When you’re feeling frustrated or stressed, it means you’re being given an opportunity. A gift!
And frustration means that it’s time to set up (or re-establish) new standards and boundaries. (Very often this shows up when you’ve worked with someone for a while and it’s time to reinforce previously established ones.)
With this particular client, you may have fallen into the rescuer role and you really do want to support them to get their desired outcomes. And, if you’re really honest about it, you want this person to get results so that you feel good about yourself and your ego can celebrate that you’re a great coach. You want this client to get results, maybe even more than he or she does.
Because it means something about you.
You want this person to like you.
But, that’s not why this person hired you…this person didn’t hire you to be their friend.
This person hired you to call them forth and to empower them to step into 100%-responsibility-for-everything so that he or she can see that it’s possible to create the life or business or health or relationship that they want.
I’m curious…where are you taking over responsibility for your clients results?
Think about the clients you’re working with…who are you frustrated with?
Why are you frustrated?
Is this person overstepping the previously set boundaries?
Is it time to create new boundaries (no text messages, requiring pre-call questions be completed, etc.)?
Or is this an internal, over-responsibility-taking role that you’ve slipped into?
Where are you being responsible FOR your clients, rather than being responsible TO them?
When you’re responsible for your clients results, your ego is attached to their outcomes. When you’re responsible to your clients, you’re taking full responsibility for delivering what you promised, showing up, coaching and supporting the person. Their outcomes have nothing to do with you, it’s all about them and what they choose to do or not do.
See the difference?
Your assignment today is to seek out places where you feel frustrated or stressed with your clients, yourself, and your business. Yes, SEEK out places of frustration because it’s a clue for your next level of growth.
Then, ask yourself, what new standard or boundary will prevent this stress and frustration?
That, my friend, is how you grow.